Pondering…

After several friends from intersecting friend groups pestered me for months, I finally joined Pinterest last week. Granted, it wasn’t to appease them that I succumbed…rather, it was because I’m helping a friend with a project and he, being out of the country, directed me to his Pinterest for guidance on what to do.

There’s no way I’d ever get into this, was my first impression after joining. (Oh, for those learning about Pinterest for the first time, I’d summarize it as a personal wall where you pin pictures of interest to you.) I wondered where anyone would ever find anything to pin here. Do you go online to browse the internet for things to pin? And how could you ever figure out whose accounts to follow other than your friends’?

In the four days since I joined, I’ve received an average of four emails per day, informing me of a new follower to my pins. All from friends, of course, who are probably just doing the courteous thing to welcome me to another procrastination device. What has struck me, though, is the response those email notifications evoked in me…

Seemingly out of nowhere, I found myself thinking about my audience. How shall I portray myself to them? What impression would I like for them to have of me based on my pins? Before I was even aware of it, I got caught up in fabricating an image of myself for a pass-time I’m not even certain I’ll keep up with!

This realization has spurred many, many thoughts that I’ll probably come back to flesh out at some point here…How to find the balance between decorum and authenticity…Self-image versus projected persona…My blogging philosophy…Leadership when you actually have followers…The wall versus the timeline on facebook…etc etc etc…

So anyway, I’m on Pinterest…for now Let me know if you’d like an invitation!

I love Sabbath! It’s not so much the “not working” aspect of it. And, as much as I love the fellowship with fellow believers, that’s not what I love most either. Sabbath school time is up there for what makes Sabbath awesome, but that’s not it. And choir is so much fun, but not the best part.

My favorite time of the week, and the best part of Sabbath is Friday evening, after vespers. When I come home (or the guests leave); I bid my roommate goodnight; and then just spend time alone with Jesus. There’s nothing like it! It’s my absolute favorite time of the week

There’s a song by Chris Rice titled “Big Enough” that asks a lot of questions. It’s on one of my work-music playlists so sometimes, I’ll hear it several times in one day. As it played yesterday, the lyrics finally became audible.

“God, if You’re there, I wish You’d show me
And God if You care then I need You to know me
I hope You don’t mind me askin’ the questions…”

My brother (whom I love and adore!) used to torment me as a child. He slapped me around to make me tougher. Made me sing while running to increase my lung capacity. Threatened to make me read the book of Revelation, which, back then, I thought was just full of scary monsters! All of these things made me a stronger person. One of the greatest gifts he gave me, though, was permission to question my faith.

You’ll understand, that for a young girl who grew up in the church, questions like, “Does God even really exist?” can be traumatizing. So, when he would bring up like topics, I’d fight really hard to dismiss them from my mind. “How do you know that what you believe is the truth?” “What if the Bible isn’t actually God’s Word?”

The scariest thing about these questions was the possibility that my answers would contradict the faith I had been raised in. What if I came to the conclusion that God didn’t exist? What if my church wasn’t God’s true church? Or what if the Bible wasn’t the inspired Word of God? I was afraid to ask the questions…

Memory fails me for the timeline, but I remember, at some point during my early teens, my parents told me that if ever I found that the church I grew up in did not follow the Bible, I should leave and join a church that does. They were both converts to the faith. They raised me in the church they believed to be true to the Word of God, but my allegiance was not to be to this church. Rather, I was to be true to God’s Word, even if it led me out of the faith I’d been raised in.

Who knows how serious they were with that liberty? But at least it gave me a freedom that engendered security. You’d have to be confident in what you believe to allow your child to question it. Ooh, or maybe it was reverse psychology…so I wouldn’t actually ask the questions? I started asking them anyway. With a lot of fear at first…hoping I’d end up where I’d started; then with greater confidence that asking was the right thing to do.

The God I believe in is the kind of God who wants to be known – hence, the Bible. He does everything He can to disclose Himself to humanity (Hebrews 1:1-3). Assuming He exists and that this is true of Him, then why wouldn’t He answer my sincere questions?

Rather than spending my life afraid to look into legitimate matters that present themselves to my thoughts for consideration, I’ve embraced the questions. So far, I still believe that God exists. I still believe in the Bible as His inspired Word. And I am still a part of the faith I was brought up in. I hope to remain intellectually honest as time progresses, to remain true to myself and to the things I believe to be true.

The refrain to Chris Rice’s song ends:

“I hope You don’t mind me askin’ the questions
But I figure You’re big enough
I figure You’re big enough…”

When the weather started turning chilly, I took the air out of my bike tires and brought it inside. But having experienced the joy of exercise, I actually couldn’t bear the idea of a sedentary life all winter long. So I laced my running shoes…haha, actually, more like, strapped my vibrams, and ran off in search of runners’ high.

Along with runners’ high, though, I found runners’ knee. You see, when I first started running, I could only go so far before my heart was beating so hard I thought it’d pop out of my chest. But after several weeks, I was doing 2miles, easy. My goal was a 5k for Thanksgiving.

That didn’t happen, because I was too busy spending time with friends on Thanksgiving, so I went out to make up for it the next day. It was a beautiful day. Sun shining, uncharacteristically for so near December. Cool enough to feel thoroughly invigorating. Warm enough for just a t-shirt. I’d done about 3miles but I felt like I could just keep on going!

So, I did. I kept running. That was my longest run yet. Pathetic, I know, for those marathoners out there, but an accomplishment for little me! I wondered how far I could go before getting tired. And the little pain in my left knee…it’d go away once I stopped, right?

I upped the distance too drastically…probably didn’t even realize my form disintegrating the longer I ran. So, here I am, 2months later…that pain in my left knee…not gone!

It was so beautiful yesterday, I took a break in the middle of the day to go for a run. I almost completed a mile before my knee started complaining again. Argh. It’s so frustrating! Now that my heart can do it, my body won’t.

As I limped home, upset with my body, I realized something. My knee is as much a part of my body, as is my heart. When my heart was too weak to go the distance, I worked with it. I took the time to condition it, to strengthen it, so that it could endure. Why then, was I so short fused when it came to my knee? It was my neglect, in the first place, that led to its pain.

Reminded me of the sermon at church 2weeks ago “The Same Spirit.”

You know what else? When my heart was too weak, I would say that, “I cannot run more than a quarter mile.” But now that it’s my knee limiting me, I say, “My knee won’t let me run more than a mile.” It’s as if I’d embraced a certain dualism with regards to my being. A flawed dualism! Or is dualism, in essence flawed?

So it’s nice outside again today. But I won’t be going for a run. I finally acquiesced and bought a knee brace. If my knee can’t do it, then I can’t do it because my knee and me, we are one.

A friend of mine would always respond to the nonchalant “how are you?” with “I can’t complain.” So taking a cue from him, I came up with my own array of responses that are more descriptive than “fine.” On the short list are “can’t complain” (how original right…), “I’m well” (then you know things are dandy), “I’m alive” (practicing an attitude of gratitude), and “I’m awake” (when staying awake can be considered a victory…). Of these responses, my favorite, right now, is “I’m alive” and here’s why (the long version…):

I had an awesome day Friday! After going to the office and putting in a productive 2hrs, I came home to finish unpacking my room, which I hadn’t finished unpacking since moving in August last year (ahem). Aaaand, I actually worked through the stacks that were piling up, neatly against my wall…I even got to the stuff under my bed . Before sundown, I’d cleaned the kitchen, vacuumed my room and was on my way to take a shower! I like taking a shower just as the sun sets, symbolically washing away the cares of the week for a fresh start.

I’d had an awesome devotion in the morning – thinking about Jesus’ sacrifice on the cross as I studied through the Sabbath school lesson study guide faithfully last week (ps: faithfully is the operative word because I’m usually not so faithful with that…ahem, ahem). It was one of those days that you spend the day with Jesus, just thinking of Him, talking to Him, praying about anything and everything that comes to mind. So throughout the day, I’d been making commitments for my relationship with God and some difficult decisions I hadn’t been ready to make until then. And top it off with good fellowship and an awesome Bible study in the evening in spite of treacherously snowy roads, for an awesome Friday.

Sabbath morning, the lesson study gelled together and I figured out how I would approach the class. One of those days that you’re excited to be the teacher because you learnt so much during the week and you figured out a way to lead the class to the revelations God had given you. So, believe it or not, I was out of my apartment around 9am though Sabbath school starts at 10 and it’s a 20-25min commute. I even had enough time to clean my neighbors car while warming my car up!

On the way I mused about my windshield crack that doubled in size in just one night a week back. Regretting not having taken it to the windshield repair people during the summer, I wondered if it would crack all the way to the end and then spontaneously shatter as I’m driving one day. At this juncture, I’d probably need to have the entire thing replaced…I’m too poor argh, but if it was a safety thing I’d have to do it huh. A stitch in time saves nine!

Traffic was slowing down ahead and I wondered if I could come to a full stop without bumping the person ahead of me. The road was a little slick so I looked to the left lane for safety in case I needed to switch over. But there was a pick-up truck coming at a speed that wouldn’t allow me to switch over…I’d just have to make the stop. Uttering a quick prayer I pumped my brakes and with 12feet between me and the car ahead, I was confident enough of safety to thank God for preventing a fender bender. It would have been so inconvenient to have to exchange information etc.

Just as the praise was escaping my lips, I noticed the pick-up truck in the fast lane, still going a little too fast, in my estimation. I mentally commented on how folk in larger vehicles are often too confident about how well their cars can handle slick conditions. Then the driver must have stepped on their brakes pretty suddenly because I saw the back of the truck fishtail in the direction of the median and thought, “I hope he doesn’t hit me when he swings back this way.”

Impact. At the front end of my car. The orientation of my vehicle shifted ninety degrees to the right and I was headed for the trailer of a Walmart semi truck at a standstill next to me. “I’ve always wondered if you could go all the way under one of these…”

Impact. As the glass begun to shatter, I let go of the steering wheel, bowed down my head and covered it with my hands, made sure I didn’t have my foot on the brake or accelerator so I wouldn’t step on the wrong one at the wrong time. I felt glass spraying.

Impact. I wondered if I’d gone all the way under the semi and was hitting a wall on the other side. That’d be totally radical! But I was still in motion. I reminded myself to relax like a drunkard to avoid more injuries than necessary…

Impact. Probably the greatest impact yet on the front end drivers side. I wasn’t moving anymore. Car still running. Oh, I should check for the smell of gas. That was ridiculous! Why do I still have my head covered? I think it’s over. Wait, I’m actually alive. Do I feel pain anywhere? I wonder where I ended up…

“Are you ok, ma’am?” There were three gentlemen, each stopped independently to find out if I was alright. Taking my hands off of my head and with a smile on my face, I said “I’m fine.” Haha. And that is the appropriate use of that response!

It was only when they counselled me to get out of the vehicle that I felt the adrenaline response…my entire body was shaking. Why am I shaking, I wondered. Ahhh, it’s the adrenaline! haha. They told me to turn off the car, so I did and put the keys on the seat. I was so glad I picked warmth over class when I chose a coat that morning!

They’d already called 911 and seeing that I was ok, one of them left me their phone number as they drove off. Oh no, I was going to miss Sabbath school I called someone and asked him to find a cover for me teaching class that morning stating that I’d been in a little accident (I didn’t want people making a fuss). I told him I was fine!

Looking at my shattered windshield, I thought, What a way to answer my ramblings about the crack in my windshield…I guess I will need a new one altogether!

Fire department came and helped the Walmart guy across the street so he could take pictures of my car for the record. He was so nice and made me think better of Walmart now. When he put his fatherly arm around my shoulders, I thought I was about to break down and cry. But why? Ahh, shock…I must be like in shock, I thought to myself. But I couldn’t start crying now…not when I needed to try and think straight. So I released myself from his arm as he told me that he saw the whole thing! Thank God!

The firemen let me sit in their truck as we waited for the cops to come and take a crash report. We waited for 2hrs…The wreckers waited too…In the meantime, I asked a friend to come and get me. We made it to the last 30mins of a sermon on how we need every part of the body.

I’ve been warned about the PTSD and the aches that show up 2days later…oh, and the pieces of shattered glass that will continue to turn up in random places…For now, I’m just trying to get it out of my hair!

This is the report. Reflections to follow And here are some pictures…

Probably the scariest view of my car...

What the windshield looked like on the inside

Shattered glass on the front seats...there was some all the way to the back seat too

Not sure what I hit to get that dent

Lost half of my rear bumper...fireman had to get it from the middle of the highway

View of the accident from inside the fire truck

The year 2011 goes down in the history of my life as the toughest year yet. And where there are challenges, there are lessons to be learnt. So here are the top 3 lessons I learnt this past year:

Lesson #1

Love at first sight does, indeed, exist

Okay, well, maybe not love at first sight, really…because you grow to love someone. But, to adopt a well-coined phrase, “recognition of potential at initial observation” or “ropaio” can actually happen. What happens after the ropaio is another story Taking a broad sweep of my year, this lesson came at a time when my belief in romantic love and subsequent marriage was waning. I still think that Hollywood and its rom-com industry has done my generation a great disservice, but now I believe, again, that God can write even better love stories!

Lesson #2

Unfaithfulness to God is never self-contained

The decisions we make in the privacy of our own minds have repercussions in the world of our influence. The reality of every individuals influence is an exciting notion when we are leading others in the right direction. On the other hand, it becomes a bitter pill when those we care about are hurt by our bad choices. It’s never just about me.

Lesson #3

My parents are human

A child’s parents are as God to them; their word is law; they are provider. I was blessed to be raised by God-fearing parents and it’s easy to, in a sense, idolize “perfect” parents. But one of the marks of mature adulthood is a healthy relationship with your parents. They make mistakes. They hurt each other and they hurt you. They can no longer provide for your needs. You may even disagree with them at times. And yet, in spite of these things, you still love and honor them.

So simple now that I’ve summarized them, but it took a painful year filled with disappointment and regret to learn these lessons. To be fair, I also experienced encouragement to buttress the disappointment, salvation for my regrets and hope that runs deeper than the pain.
I have a new determination coming out of my 2011 experience, and that is that no matter what 2012 brings, I want to go it with Jesus!

I’ve been ruminating on 2 Timothy 2:3 of late which reads, “Thou therefore endure hardness, as a good soldier of Jesus Christ.”
This past year has revealed to me my lack of endurance when trying times come. Or at least, even though I “endured” the challenges, my attitude would not qualify as that of a “good soldier!”
I’m thankful, though, that whenever we come to Jesus, He is ready and willing to save. And so, to His loving arms, I come.
This excerpt, from Sketches from the Life of Paul pages 147-148, presents a picture of how I would like to deal with troublesome times in the future:

“Paul’s ministry in Ephesus had been a season of incessant labor, of many trials, and deep anguish. He taught the people in public and from house to house, instructing and warning them with many tears. He was continually opposed by the unbelieving Jews, who lost no opportunity to stir up the popular feeling against him. Again and again he was attacked by the mob, and subjected to insult and abuse. By every means which they could employ, the enemies of truth sought to destroy the effects of his labor for the salvation of men.

“And while thus battling against opposition, and with untiring zeal pushing forward the gospel work and guarding the interests of a church yet young in the faith, Paul was bearing upon his soul the burden of all the churches. Nor was he released even from the tax of physical labor. Here, as at Corinth, he worked with his own hands to supply his necessities. In weariness and painfulness from unceasing toil and constant danger, enfeebled by disease, and at times depressed in spirits, he steadfastly pursued his work.

“The news which he received, of apostasy in churches of his own planting, caused him deep anguish. He greatly feared that his efforts in their behalf would prove to have been in vain. Many a sleepless night was spent in prayer and earnest thought, as he learned of the new and varied methods employed to counteract his work. As he had opportunity, he wrote to the churches, giving reproof, counsel, admonition, and encouragement, as their state demanded. In his epistles the apostle does not dwell on his own trials, yet there are occasional glimpses of his labors and sufferings in the cause of Christ. Stripes and imprisonment, cold and hunger and thirst, perils by land and sea, in the city and in the wilderness, from his own countrymen, from the heathen, and from false brethren,—all these he endured for the truth’s sake. He was defamed, reviled, “made the offscouring of all things,” “perplexed, persecuted, troubled on every side,” “in jeopardy every hour,” “alway delivered unto death for Jesus’ sake.”

“Amid the constant storm of opposition, the clamor of enemies, and the desertion of friends, the intrepid apostle at times almost lost heart. But he looked back to Calvary, and with new ardor pressed on to spread the knowledge of the Crucified. He was but treading the blood-stained path which Christ had trodden before him. He sought no discharge from the warfare till he should lay off his armor at the feet of his Redeemer.

“Eighteen centuries have passed since the apostle rested from his labors; yet the history of his toils and sacrifices for Christ’s sake are among the most precious treasures of the church. That history was recorded by the Holy Spirit, that the followers of Christ in every age might thereby be incited to greater zeal and faithfulness in the cause of their Master.

“How does this hero of faith tower above the self-indulgent, ease-loving men who are today crowding the ranks of the ministry. When subjected to the ordinary difficulties and trials of life, many feel that their lot is hard. But what have they done or suffered for the cause of Christ? How does their record appear when compared with that of this great apostle? What burden of soul have they felt for the salvation of sinners? They know little of self-denial or sacrifice. They are indebted to the grace of Christ for all the excellences of character which they possess, for every blessing which they enjoy. All that they are, and all that they have, is the purchase of the blood of Christ. As the servants of Christ encounter opposition and persecution, they should not permit their faith to grow dim or their courage to fail. With Christ as a helper, they can resist every foe, and overcome every difficulty. The same obligation rests upon them which impelled the apostle to his unwearied labors. Only those who emulate his fidelity, will share with him the crown of life.”

This morning, I’m so glad I’m a creationist! See, I was just thinking in the shower (the place from whence all brilliance emanates) that to believe that all things just naturally occur is deterministic – that once things are set in motion, they just flow to their determined end: An end determined by the laws of nature, so to speak.

Recently, there has sprouted in my heart, an abiding fear of repeating my parents’ mistakes. You know that third and fourth generation curse…like, what if I’m in the second generation? I’m doomed!
The fear is recent probably because it’s only recently that I’ve been forced to or had the courage to stare into the face of my parents’ failures. Being an idealist, I guess I unwittingly imagined my parents to be perfect. But they’re not perfect. And my entire being rebels against the reality. The truth can be a painful thing.

So, anyways, as I’ve been looking down the barrel of my parents’ shortcomings, I tremble at the possibility that I’m looking into my own future. (Please note, that my parents are not all failures and no successes. In fact, they’re probably mostly successes which eclipsed, for so long, my realization of the failures. I’ve just had to take a long hard look at the other side of the coin…that’s all). If I am my parents’ daughter, then I’ll have the same tendencies that they do…even the not-so-great ones. Hence the fear.

But as I was thinking in the shower, I realized how deterministic that logic is. Who said I have to make the same mistakes that my parents made?! So, that’s what naturally occurs…but I believe in a God who is above nature!
Yes, an object in motion will remain in motion, UNLESS an unbalanced force acts on it. I’m doomed to make the mistakes of my parents, UNLESS God intervenes. And, I believe in the kind of God who does intervene. If He didn’t, the earth would still be without form, and void, and darkness would still cover the face of the earth!

I was well on my way to writing another pessimistic post, this time about having children, when a conversation with a friend, on the topic, revealed a flaw in my perspective. It’s kinda like the whole glass half full or half empty thing…

Focusing on the emptiness breeds fear, you see. But God has not given us a spirit of fear! So it’s un-Christian to focus on the negative.
Ok, so marriages can fail. Spouses can disappoint each other. And yet marriages can also succeed! Spouses can remain faithful. And the home can be happy!
Ok, so having children is scary because you’re responsible for the molding of a life that you could quite easily ruin! Yet, you could also raise children who will bless the world through their influence!

Here’s a quote I read in a book titled, “I Love Books” p405:

“Let me introduce you to two philosophers of the Alexandrian school. Posidippus is one, Metrodorus the other. They will speak to you – first Posidippus:
“What path of life may one hold? In the market place are strifes and hard dealings, in the house cares; in the country labor enough, and at sea terror; and abroad, if thou hast aught, fear, and if thou art in poverty, vexation. Art married? thou wilt not be without anxieties; unmarried? thy life is yet lonelier. Children are troubles; a childless life is a crippled one. Youth is foolish, and gray hairs again feeble. In the end the choice is one of these two: either never to be born, or, as soon as born, to die.”

“Now listen to Metrodorus, who has heard what his fellow philosopher has to say:
“Hold every path of life. In the market place are honors and prudent dealings, in the house rest; in the country the charm of nature, and at sea gain; and abroad, if thou has aught, glory, and if thou art in poverty, thou alone knowest it. Art married? so will thine household be blest; unmarried? thy life is yet lighter. Children are darlings; a childless life is an unanxious one; youth is strong, and gray hairs again reverend. The choice is not then of one of the two, either never to be born or to die; for all things are good in life.”"

Posidippus and Metrodorus make true observations from different angles and that affects their conclusions on whether life is worth living or not. Posidippus’ conclusion is clearly un-Christian for why would God give us life if it weren’t worth living?! But Metrodorus’ conclusion seems unrealistic because really, it’s not all good – what of sin!?

And that’s where God steps in!

See, it was originally all good – in fact, it was goodx6 and very good! But then sin entered the world and now the same plant is a thorn bush and a rose bush at the same time. The thing is, with God, it’s all roses, but without Him, it’s all thorns.
Jesus came and bore the pain so that we could pick the rose. Check out this quote from “Thoughts from the Mount of Blessing” p71:

“The Father’s presence encircled Christ, and nothing befell Him but that which infinite love permitted for the blessing of the world. Here was His source of comfort, and it is for us. He who is imbued with the spirit of Christ abides in Christ. The blow that is aimed at him falls upon the Savior, who surrounds him with His presence. Whatever comes to him comes from Christ. He has no need to resist evil for Christ is his defense. Nothing can touch him except by our Lord’s permission, and “all things” that are permitted “work together for good to them that love God” Romans 8:28″

With confidence in a God who is our shield like that, how could a Christian not stop to smell the roses?! It doesn’t mean the negatives don’t exist. It just means that Christ has taken on all of the negatives for us already and will only permit that which would bless our lives.

I could go on and on about this but one last point and I’ll call it quits for now. Aside from the blatant lack of trust in God that a pessimistic attitude reveals, it also ultimately leads to the fulfillment of the very things we fear! You’re so afraid of making a mistake that the fear paralyzes you into making that very mistake. Moreover, you can’t be trusting God while you’re fearing evil. Here’s a quote I read this morning in “Patriarchs and Prophets” p513 about the Israelites – this is after they finally possessed the Promised Land:

“The cowards and rebels had perished in the wilderness, but the righteous spies ate of the grapes of Eschol. To each was given according to his faith. The unbelieving had seen their fears fulfilled. Notwithstanding God’s promise, they had declared that it was impossible to inherit Canaan, and they did not possess it. But those who trusted in God, looking not so much to the difficulties to be encountered as to the strength of their Almighty Helper, entered the goodly land…”

I want to trust God enough to smell the roses!

It’s such a crazy thing to get married, you know. I mean, you know someone for what, all of 1 or 2 or 3, maybe 5 or 6 years on the lengthy side of things…then you decide that you will spend THE REST OF YOUR LIFE with them! Waking up next to them…sharing toothpaste even, maybe…sharing groceries, choosing where to live, how much to spend, where to go when…perhaps even producing offspring together! And you’ve known this person for just 3yrs before all of that! Crazy!

My conclusion after pondering this insanity that overtakes humanity, is that there must be some compelling force, that prompts two individuals to choose to do something so risky. Some would call it love. I’m not certain it’s always love. But at the least, life without this other person has to seem worse than the risk of life with this person. Sometimes life with them is better. Sometimes life with them is less bad than life without them. So you take the plunge.

But then, another factor was recently introduced to my musings on this matter…Like they say, it takes two to tango. So to make a relationship work, both parties have to work on the relationship. Well, what if you wake up one day, and the person next to you doesn’t want to work on it any longer? What if 1yr into it, they just up and quit? Or 25yrs into it, they don’t want to put in the effort any longer?

That’s the scariest aspect of mawej to me, right now. Fine, it’ll be hard to meld two lives together (and harder the longer you’re single, I’m sure) but you can do it, if both of you want to do it.

What makes someone decide to stop investing in a relationship that used to mean everything to them?

I guess, in order to take the plunge and make the pledge, you’ve got to demonstrate some level of trust that you’re both in it to succeed. But the “what ifs” are real! And they’ve come true too many times to ignore . So what do you do?

Psalm 146:3 comes to mind. Trust no-one! People will always let you down. It’s not always malicious. In fact, most times, it’s a genuine mistake. But at the end of the day, whether in malice or mistake, people will let you down.

But God. He will never fail you. If anything, we’re always failing Him. But He’ll never take back a pledge He’s made, won’t forget a promise, won’t quit on ya. We can trust Him!

Here’s what I figure. Perhaps if instead of working on their relationship, a couple worked, together and individually, on their relationship with God, then God, who never fails, will help them keep their relationship together. So that while you cannot trust your spouse, you can trust God to keep them committed to you.

Come to think of it, it’s not just your spouse you can’t trust…You can’t trust yourself!