Most people who have found out from me that I’m in a relationship, respond first with incredulity. haha. Yes, they laugh. Then they notice my straight face and double back, “wait…you’re serious?”

Apparently part of why it’s so unbelievable is because they didn’t see it on Facebook! And to be sure, once they’re in the loop about the fact, they’re on Facebook trying to figure out how they missed it.

It’s not the most obvious thing on Facebook because when we begun our courtship, we decided against a status change. I’m pretty sure neither of us could have articulated it quite as such at the time, but here are 5 reasons why we kept it off Facebook:

1. Authenticity: Eliminate the need to keep up appearances so we could be real and seriously tackle the issues that would make for a solid relationship

2. Community: Avoid the temptation of a false sense of community and be intentional about creating a substantial community that would keep us accountable in our relationship

3. Freedom: Maintain the sense of freedom to explore our compatibility with limited fall-out if it came to that – not that either of us went into it planning on a break-up, but neither were we married already

4. Family: We wanted to be able to tell close family and friends ourselves as opportunities afforded

5. Simplicity: This one reason was probably clearest for us both – keeping it off Facebook just simplified an already formidable process of preparation for a possible life together.

So it never was a secret that we were in a relationship, and it isn’t a secret that we’re engaged now! (I’m so excited I’d like to shout it from a roof-top – he’s so wonderful to me!) But, I think we’ll keep things as they are for now 🙂